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You will find the perfect person who loves you as much as you love him, and you'll look back on this and laugh." While I couldn't understand then that you need to love someone who loves you back, I get it now. My grandparents died before I was born and my parents are deceased and never liked anyone I dated, really. Don't marry anyone who won't help with the cat litter box when you are away, busy or when you are sick.Twenty years, three children and a dog later, I'm still married to the man who loved me back. The couple who served as my polestars for love shared litter box tasks (and everything else).I dated my college boyfriend for 10 years and then dove into marriage with him for the next 7. So it isn’t useful to cross your arms until things change. John Gottman, my favorite relationship researcher, points out that fighting is a predictor of divorce! No, most marital arguments can’t be fully resolved (69% of them aren’t resolved according to Gottman). Reading about the research on what makes marriages work, we probably should have been fighting more. Our not-fighting was a sign of not sharing our feelings rather than of contentedness.

At the luxury Samoset Resort, couples can have it all: incredible scenery, elegant accommodations and a choice of dining options.

You might want to practice breathing deeper or asking for a break when overwhelmed. Two tips: (1) find ways of starting a conversation that doesn’t trigger your partner (e.g., make them defensive, or make them shut-down) and (2) research “non-violent communication” practices. Find a couple things about your partner that you are willing to accept just as they are. ” Fights can easily arise when you start making assumptions about why your partner is like they are.

Maybe he is messy and maybe you just leave that alone. A greater understanding of your partner can lead to greater empathy and less fighting. A huge key to shifting away from fighting with your partner is to understand yourself better.

For the ultimate privacy on your romantic getaway, book one of the luxurious cottages with views of Penobscot Bay and the golf course.

Each cottage has a fully-equipped kitchen, two gas fireplaces and flat screen TVs.


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